Broccoli Edamame Pesto

I tend to hodgepodge gluten-free recipes with vegan recipes. Honestly, if I didn't, we probably wouldn't have much of anything to eat. This isn't really an example of that per say but it is a combo of two recipes I thought were genius. When I stumbled upon this NYTimes Broccoli Pesto I knew I had to mash it together with an edamame pesto I've long since memorized. Bonus: 1 serving packs as much protein as a chicken breast. Take that herbivore haters!

Serves 4
20 minutes

8oz Edamame, thawed
1/2 Lb Broccoli
3 Garlic cloves
1 cup Basil
3 Tbsp Nutrition yeast
3 Tbsp Olive oil
Juice of 1/2 lemon
1 tsp Salt
1 Lb Quinoa Pasta

1. Get a pot of water boiling for your pasta and a pot for your edamame (broccoli too, if you steam like I do**)
2. Process your garlic and your basil.
3. Start cooking edamame and steam broccoli for 6 minutes. When they're both done, start cookin your pasta.
4. Add edamame, broccoli and remaining ingredients to processor. Process to nice, minced pesto consistency.
5. When pasta is done, drain and put back in your warm pot, mix in pesto and serve. So easy, so good.

** I don't know if this is common knowledge or how I discovered it myself. I do not own a steamer, I would consider them a waste of space. I just boil a couple inches of water in a medium size pot, place a mesh, all metal colander of selected vegetables inside the pot and put a small lid inside the colander, over the vegetables. The colander doesn't touch the bottom of the pot, it actually only goes down about half way into the pot. I hope I described this well enough. Any who, this method is perfect for this recipe because you can cook your edamame on the bottom and your broccoli on the top. Tah-daa!

Original Broccoli Pesto recipe from NYTimes
Comparable Edamame Pesto recipe at The PPK 

P.S. The garnish on this is a breaded squash that I will post the recipe for another day.
My Asshole Diet 

Stupid Hearty Corn Chowda' (+Broccoli)

As I stated in a previous post, I've got my eyes on the prize for another awesome Thanksgiving meal. One dish I have yet to recreate is my mothers amazing Corn Souffle but seeing as how it calls for every animal product plus corn, the idea of recreating it has been intimidating. I figured I would take a step back before approaching this one. My step back being Corn Chowda'. I threw in some broccoli because there's no such thing as too many vegetables.

Serves 8
30 minutes

1 Tbsp Olive oil
1/2 White onion, finely chopped
1 Bell pepper, seeded and finely diced
8 Red potatoes, some diced, some chopped
2 Stocks celery, diced
3 Carrots, diced
1 Head broccoli, finely chopped
2 Bay leaves, broken
8 cups Vegetable broth
3 Tbsp Better Than Bouillon, No Chicken Base
1 cup Cashews, soaked 8 hours in water (I wont lie, I spaced this and soaked them for an hour and lived to tell the tale)
1/3 cup Cornstarch
3 cups Fresh or frozen white & yellow corn
Pepper to taste

1. Heat a big ol' pot with EVOO in the bottom. Saute onions for a minute or so, than add the rest of your chopped veggies plus bay leaf pieces, saute for about 5 minutes.
2. Add 6 cups of your broth and than your bouillon.
3. In the meantime do two things: First, add cashews (minus water) and 1 cup of veggie broth into processor and process till smooth. Second, add cornstarch into your last remaining cup of veggie broth and mix.
4. Once taters are tender, add cashew blend, corn starch blend, corn and pepper, bring to a nice hot temperature again.
5. Eat. Watch out for bay leaves.

Original recipe from Cheeky Kitchen
My Asshole Diet 

Green Bean Casserole

This was always a favorite growing up and one of my first challenges after going vegan. In my search for a solution I found one of my favorite (and now revitalized) sites: VeganYumYum. I was very proud to serve this to my boyfriend when we first met but he quickly protested the gravy with the simple statement: I hate mushrooms. I, of course, took this as a personal challenge. As always, I've added my own changes to the recipe and listed the original below.

Serves 4
20 minutes

1 lb Fresh Green Beans
1 Tbsp Olive Oil
2 Cups Mushrooms
2 Ribs Celery, diced
4 Tbsp Earth Balance Margarine
4 Tbsp King Aurthur's Gluten-Fee Flour
1 to 1 1/2 Cups Almond Milk
Salt to taste
1 tsp Thyme
1/4 Crushed Red Peppers
1/8  Liquid Smoke
S*#! ton Black Pepper (probably 1/2 tsp)
Walnuts for garnish, roughly chopped

1.Start your steaming mechanism. I throw the mushrooms in a food processor for a more smooth gravy texture. Heat up the EVOO in a skillet and saute mushrooms, celery and a pinch of salt for a hot minute, than remove to a bowl on the side.
2. Start steaming your green beans.
3. Meanwhile; melt "butter" in the same skillet, then add "flour" and whisk. Slowly add "milk", whisking all the way. When milk is all in, add your spices.
4. Add mushroom/celery combo. Add more milk as/if needed.
5. Assemble: green beans down first, dollop of gravy, throw them walnuts on top.

The boyfriend completely approves of the newest version btw.

Original recipe from VeganYumYum 
My Asshole Diet

Mashed Cauliflower

This being my 3rd year as a vegan, I'm still getting used to vegan holiday meals. About this time of year I start warming up with ideas of what to cook. I was having a conversation with a fellow A Hole dieter who suggested this recipe (for the record Katherine couldn't be any more far removed from an A Hole,... besides her diet). I feel like mashed potatoes are so personal, there are so many different ways you can make them: truffle oil, spicy, "cheese & bacon", Italian spiced, wasabi, etc. This is just your jumping point.

Serves 2-4
25 minutes

1 Head of cauliflower, roughly chopped
3 Garlic cloves, minced
2 Tbsp Earth Balance "butter"
2 Tbsp Almond milk
Salt & pepper to taste
Chives for garnish

1. Steam cauliflower till you can easily slice through it with a spoon. Throw it in a food processor for a quick smooth mashing (or mixer, or labor intensive with a masher)
2. Mix all, minus the chives
3. Devour.
My Asshole Diet 

Quinoa Salad with Tomatoes, Kalamata Olives, Basil and Mint

I'm not the largest fan of quinoa salads because they're so heavy on the quinoa. I more often than not double the non-quinoa ingredients (or half the quinoa, it's all relative really) This one is simple, tasty and incorporates one of my favorite vegan unamis; olives.

Serves 4
20 minutes

1 Garlic clove, minced

1 cup Quinoa, cooked

1 Small tomato, diced

1 Carrot, diced

3 Scallions, sliced (white and light green sections)

1/4 cup pitted Kalamata olives, chopped

1/3 Pepita (or shaved pecans, almonds or walnuts)

Sea salt and pepper, to taste

1 Tbsp Fresh basil leaves, chopped

1-2 Tbsp Fresh mint leaves, chopped

Olive Oil

Juice of 1-2 lemons or limes, depending upon size

A hand full flax seed 

1. While the quinoa is cooking, get to slicing and dicing your other ingredients. Put in large bowl with all the rest of the ingredients.

2. Wait till quinoa has cooled a bit and add to bowl, mix, taste and adjust spices. All done!

I add flax seed to a lot of recipes because it blends right in and is a great source of Omegas.

Original Recipe from Gluten-Free Goddess
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Moroccan Carrot Ribbons and Black (Or in my case, Green) Lentils

I've been wanting to try this one out for a bit and I'm so bummed it took me so long because it's un-freaking-believable. I was unable to find black lentil so I used French green lentils (shoot me for it). Besides that near disastrous escapade, this recipe was quick, easy and will forever be a part of regular rotation. Per usual, I made a few tweaks according to what was in my spice collection and personal taste (the original recipe is listed below)

Serves 4
20-30 minutes

Carrot Marinade:
1 Tbsp Lemon juice
2 Tbsp. Orange juice
Pinch of salt

Dressing:
1 Tbsp Cumin
1/2 Tbsp Anise seeds
1/2 tsp Cinnamon
1/4 tsp Ground ginger
1/2 tsp Paprika
1/2 tsp Ground coriander
Pinch of crushed chilies
1 Tbsp Lemon juice
1 tsp Agave
2 Tbsp Olive oil
Pinch of salt

Ingredients:
1 cup French green lentils
3-4 Carrots
1/2 cup Red onion
8 Prunes
1/2 cup Mint, chopped


1. Mix together your carrot marinade in a large bowl. Wash and peel your carrots in long strokes for desired "ribbon" fanciness. Place in marinade.
2. Cook your lentils as directed (usually 2:1 water:lentil ratio, boil water, turn to medium, add lentil, cook for 20-30 min yada yada). Rinse to make it pretty, I don't bother.
3. While your lentil is cooking make your dressing. Just put it all in a bowl and mix. Also, finely-ish chop your onions, prunes and mint.
4. When all is ready to go, mix it all in that OG marinade bowl and serve. Yum!

Original recipe created by Sarah Britton from My New Roots via Whole Living
My Asshole Diet 

Beet Hummus on Cucumber "Crackers"

I had this great idea to make a vegetable that tastes like dirt (which I enjoy, don't get me wrong) into a dessert. I peeled, cubed and roasted some beets in balsamic vinegar, what I got was some roasted beets that the boyfriend hated. Fail. Alas, I was not about to let 4 perfectly roasted beets go to waste and I happened to be throwing a party the next night.

Serves 4-6
1 hour (including the roast)

3-4 Beets, peeled and cubed
Balsamic vinegar
Olive oil
2 Tbsp tahini
1 Tbsp cumin
Pinch of salt
Lemon, juiced
A cucumber
Mint and 4-5 walnuts for garnish

1. Drizzle large foil square in olive oil, throw beets in foil and drizzle with 2-3 tbsp balsamic vinegar. Crunch foil around cubes. Roast at 375 for 45 min or so (You should be able to pierce the beet without it screaming). After cooked through, remove from oven and allow them to cool.
2. In the mean time: Peel cucumber roughly as to leave a lil green for prettiness. Slice into quarter inch rounds (The mandolin is my hero). Pull the tiny leafs and leaf tips off the mint. Roughly chop 4-5 walnuts.
3. In food processor add: cooled beets, tahini, cumin, salt and lemon juice. Process. If the consistency is off add a little water at a time.
4. Assemble. A dollop of beet hummus on a cucumber "cracker". Push the cute little leaf into the top of the hummus using your walnut shard. Assemble right before you serve as the beet red with soak into the cucumber and discolor it, making it unworthy of Martha Stewart.
5. Watch as you blow the mind's of your friends.
My Asshole Diet